Down Time

So, this past week and weekend were not super eventful. I am trying to be at peace with that being ok.

I am a go-go-go person – even when I’m doing “nothing”, I’m doing something. It drives my ultra laid-back husband crazy.

This past week I rode Sky two days. I gave her a well-deserved day-off on Monday after our trail ride and show over the weekend. Tuesday I rode a little while in the yard. Wednesday it rained. Thursday I rode until the bugs drove Sky and I both crazy. That was an off day. Sky was pissy, I was pissy – it was all bad so I didn’t ride long.

Friday we had a lesson with John. I felt a little ill-prepared but he seemed impressed with how our progress was coming. We worked on the lope, which is good and also worked on extending her trot and pushing her shoulder over in turns. I learned how Sky drops her shoulder going to the left and how to fix it. He thought I should give her a few days off due to the bites on her back, which she is getting from the dominant horses in the herd. They aren’t healing well, so we’re going to take away the stress of the saddle pad rubbing her.

So, Sky had the whole weekend off (we didn’t have anything planned anyway). It’s a strange thing to be away from horses, for me. Sometimes I wonder what life would be like it I didn’t ride. I’ve been riding so long I barely remember. It’s not that I always want to, but it’s a rare occasion for me to not want to be around the smells of hay and leather and the sounds of tails swishing and of grain being eaten. It’s too natural to heft my saddle onto her back and for my foot to find the stirrup.

Riding and horses are such a part of my routine that it hardly ever occurs to me that I’m missing out on something by spending my time at the barn. I feel completely justified in having tan arms and white legs in July, for smelling of bug spray and horse sweat when I finally get home at 830 on a typical weeknight, for talking about Sky the way my friends discuss their kids at parties.

Here and there I’ll get a pang of longing for a “normal girl” life – to have the time and motivation to go get manicures and dedicate entire shopping trips to lip gloss and sunglasses – whatever it is useless girls do. I think in this moment of how I could be sleeping in on Sunday mornings instead of scrubbing white hocks in preparation for another horse show. I think of how many more dinners would be cooked at home and how much more time I would spend with my husband.

But then I remember, quite quickly, the feeling of riding well in a show, of accomplishing a new skill and of four legs below me climbing to the top of a mountain. I think of all the amazing people I have met because of riding and of the incredible places I have been with my horse. I think of the bond she and I have over all the changes we’ve been through together and all the learning that has been done. I remember how badly I wanted horses when I was a young girl and of how it’s still, and always has been, both a thrill and a comfort to be in the saddle.

Needless to say, the idea of not being around horses doesn’t last more than an instant. Then I remember who I am and where I feel at home. I miss Sky after this weekend. Yes, I worked on my quilt that has been ignored, Karl and I saw more of our friends, and I did get some more sleep. But I miss her and I’ll be seeing her tonight after work – I’ll give her one more day off and see how she’s healing. Life as I know and love it goes on.

C